Is this the Face of Autism? & Funny Things Ty Says!

The answer is YES! They are the many silly, cute, adorable and funny faces of a spectacular and (not so) little boy named Tyler, my youngest son. His personality shines like the sun, his giggle is contagious and fills your heart with joy until you are laughing right along with him, even if you don’t know why you are laughing. His tears will actually break your heart into pieces, his innocence will give you hope in life again, his pureness will make you believe in God. And his outbursts and temper will make you feel as though you are losing your mind! LOL I mean, let’s get real, he’s not perfect!

I posted this series of photos in an effort to show others what misconceptions are “out there” about autism/aspergers, etc. These children (and adults) are individuals, they are not “their label”. They are people just like you and me, boys and girls, men and women, who happen to have autism. They have some miswiring in their brain (don’t we all? LOL). They are not all the same and they are capable of more than many are aware of. Here is an example of an outstanding young man with autism.

NTs are Weird and This Way of Life. If this man cannot educate a person about people with autism and what they can be capable of, I don’t know who can.

Remember that just because a person cannot talk to you or look you in the eye, that doesn’t mean that they are “not aware” or “there” on the inside.

Take the man who is the author of the following two blogs for example. Once you read just one page of his blog, (look at the subject and category list!), you cannot deny the intelligence and common sense that he shows. He is humble and down to earth, just like you and I. The only difference? Some “different wiring” as my son’s doctor likes to call it.

Empathy and Understanding but NOT Sympathy

Imagine being completely aware of everything and having so much to say but not being able to communicate it to anyone. That is what I imagine it is like for someone who has autism and is non-verbal. Thank GOD we have alternative communication devices now! It’s amazing and sad at the same time to think of all the people before us who were “trapped” with no way to communicate before these technologies were created.

I am still learning even after 12 years of parenting a child with autism/aspergers, but one thing I have learned is that individuals with these health issues need empathy and understanding BUT NOT SYMPATHY. Most people I know HATE that! They don’t want you to feel sorry for them, just to be understanding, accepting and treat them just as you would anybody else.

Thinking about it, what good does sympathy do for someone? Nothing that I can think of. But I can think of tons of ways to help make a person’s life better by being understanding and having a little bit of empathy. Can’t you?

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Funny Things Ty Says

From time to time, I share funny things Ty has said or done in an attempt to show you how the world looks to a 12 year old boy with autism/aspergers, and today I’ve got a few good ones for you. They mean a lot more when you take into consideration that this is a child who, at 2 years old, I was told would have to be institutionalized by a medical “professional”.

Tyler recently talked me into getting him a 30 day free trial of GameFly which is like Netflix, only for video games. I took his video games away for several years and recently let him have them back on a trial basis and only as a reward for his iRewards program. He was so excited and so grateful, he just couldn’t find the right words to express himself and he came into my room the other night after playing one of the games he rented and said;

“Mom, you are the best mommy in the whole world. Thank you for buying me everything you buy me and thank you for getting me GameTap and thank for for everything that you do for me. You are the best mommy in the whole world!”

Then the kicker….this just made my heart melt!!!

“Thank you mom for bringing me into this world. I should be more honored all the time”.

Now if THAT is not pure, true appreciation, I don’t know what is! This makes up for all the missed Mother’s Days, all the bad ones. A lot (haha) of the difficult days and nights over the past 12 years. It was the best present I could have ever gotten 🙂 Man I love that kid. I’ll never understand how his father doesn’t. Oh well, his loss!

I should have a better way of keeping track of all the funny things he says and does, I could literally write a book and fill it with these things. But I’m usually doing something and not able to write it down. Sometimes I call my mom and say, Mom, write this down, I have to put this in his scrapbooks! lol

I have one thing to say tonight about Tyler and that is to God.

THANK YOU GOD for entrusting me with this most special, beautiful gift of love and life. I am the one who feels honored to be his mom. (now can you help me with the not so cute stuff?)

Feel free to tell me how cute Tyler is LOL (Just kidding), I hope you enjoy the slideshow. And remember, the moral of the story is, DON’T Judge a person by the way they look. You never know what is behind a look, a behavior or an action. Don’t be that jackass in the store that makes a rude comment to a stressed out parent whose child is having a fit, TRUST ME, the parent IS AWARE of what the child is doing.

And to the parents of children with disabilities; never believe everything the doctors tell you. Look at the faces that Tyler made all on his own. Is that a kid that needs to be institutionalized? He wasn’t ever going to talk or communicate and the doctor even went so far as to say that he showed signs of “psychotic tendencies” at two years old!!! Never lose hope!!!! You may have it harder than me, but there is always hope, hang on, but reach out and ask for help. If you ask enough people, sooner or later, you will find it.

Much love!